Should I Feel Guilty?

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I’ve been off-sick for four weeks now and I miss neither my job nor my students.

Although it may be a bit to soon for proper analysis, I have a few ideas in mind.

– 3 ot of my 6 classes were very difficult groups with no wish to learn whatsoever. I felt helpless then and I am pretty confident they haven’t changed.

– The school administration didn’t help us. On the contrary, whenever we complained in a meeting, we were told that we had to be understanding and not ask for the impossible. However it felt like a waste of public money to just have them in a room regardless of what we were doing as long as they were reasonably quiet.

– There have never been more students in education than now nevertheless the programs have not been reshaped to accomodate this new sort of pupils. This does not mean that the curriclum hasn’t changed, just that recommendations are piled upon recommendations with no clear objectives. I too often feel I am leaving the weaker kids behind while the bright ones dont get enough fuel for their minds.

– I may be tired of my teaching routine. After all I have been in the same school for 15 years and even there are a number of things I appreciate about it, it might not be enough to keep me going.

– I am enjoying my time off and the opportunity I have to read, write and do other stuff (almost) whenever I feel like it.

Does this mean I’m a bad teacher?

Humbled by Limitations

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I have been blessed with a healthy constitution and have never ben really sick apart from the usual children’s diseases and apendicitis when I was 9. Therefore being stuck at home, mostly in bed, with strong orders about what I can, can’t, should and shouldn’t do is quite new to me.

– I am not allowed to go up and down stairs more than twice daily and, when I do, must do it very slowly. In a three-floored house this is proving a real challenge. So I have relocated to a room in the middle of the house to make things easier.

– I miss cooking. After 5 days of extremely bland so-called vegeatarian hospital food (this could be a post in its own right) I feel like preparing my own food and eating all the vegetables and fruit I was denied for a few days before the operation.

– I am supposed to feel exhausted and don’t! Not that I mind really, of course, but I have to remind myself that I am healing, that I need to rest and take things easy.

– It’s tough and takes time to change positions. Thus washing is a difficult and long task. However it makes me realize how lucky I am to enjoy a good health. I am glad all this is only for a short period of time.

Advice Needed

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I set off for hospital last Sunday I took a couple of books with me. I knew I would have some time for reading but two seemed enough as I’d also spend a lot of time sleeping; which I did.

My first choice was Losing the Rat Race, Winning at Life by Rabbi Marc D. Angel. My friend Michael is a fan of Rabbi Angel’s and I reckoned that a short book on a topical issue would be a good start. It was a fine choice. The book is easy to read and contains numerous anecdotes and advice which makes it accessible and relevant.

The other one was The Preacher by Camilla Lackberg. I enjoy Scandinavian thrillers and I guessed I would need something easy that kept my mind off what was happening to my body and the pain I might feel. I was not disappointed. The book is not grand but it served its purpose quite nicely.

I now have about four full weeks on my hands – on my back (hope this doesn’t sound too rude) would be a more accurate description of my position lately – so I need your help. Can you advise me on books you have read recently and that you’d recommend?

Of course, I’ll also be visiting your blogs more often but I’m glad to have time for pleasurable book reading too.